whaTEVA floats your boat

OK, so until I found these questionable photos on www.refinery29.com, I had honestly never heard of the shoe brand TEVA. Mainly because:
a) I love pretty and primarily impractical shoes
b) I do not hike or participate in any form of sport or exercise that requires the donning of heinous footwear
c) I do not know anyone who hikes

So when I read Stiletto TEVA shoes, I thought "Ooooh I like stilettos" and clickitty click away I went.

Firstly, here are some google images of TEVA shoes for your viewing displeasure.

Horrifying, right?

OK, so here are the TEVA stilettos in...........................action.

These shoes are all kinds of wrong! Firstly, if you suddenly have the strong desire to go hiking, for fuck's sake just bequeath yourself in a tracksuit, chuck on some actual hiking shoes and be done with it! Wear some huge sunnies so none of the Koalas recognize you and most of all - do not let anyone take any photos of you.

Please do not under any circumstances think that wearing these god-awful excuses for shoes will make your hike more fashionable. I'm pretty sure we've just established that HIKING IS NOT FASHIONABLE!



In conclusion, if I see these shoes being worn in a non-hiking environment (no chance you'll catch me in a HIKING environment, ew) I will 100% go up to said loony and slap them across their vegan-tinted-moisturiser-smothered cheek.


Just don't take that risk.




Love,


Wear + Tear.